There are few situations that cause more angst and frustration than having to deal with another person’s anger. Whatever the reason, when another person is angry, they rarely think straight, as emotions are running strong and can have an over-bearing control over the things said and done.

What can you do when someone else is displaying anger? Here are some tips to help.

First, be absolutely clear on what the problem is.

Whether the question is about how to deal with an angry colleague or with an angry boss, the first step is to recognise the problem. The most common mistake made by most people, when it comes to dealing with anger, is playing the blame game. Sadly, this only adds fuel to the fire and the person fails to see the problem. So, recognising the problem as a genuine one, which needs to be treated is very important for treating it.

Then, Confront the Problem
The next phase of how to deal with an angry person, is confrontation. Now that you have taken notice of the issue, you need to confront the other person about it as well. Keeping it to yourself and treating it without telling the other person, will not help. Communication plays a key role in treating the problem. Thus,  listening to what they have to say is an important part of this treatment. Make a mental note of triggers that cause bouts of anger. The triggers may be small or big in nature. They may seem insignificant to you. However, you need to understand the problems from the other person’s point of view to treat it once and for all.

Now, Focus on Solving the Problem 

Once you know what the triggers are, solving the problems becomes much more organised. It is easier to design a methodical approach to solve the problem and most importantly it helps you and the person being treated, keep a track of the progress.  Instead of fighting and getting angry over trigger points it’s necessary that you look for ways to solve them instead. This way the trigger is eliminated and its frequency of recurring is also reduced. Once the person learns the benefits of problem solving, the energy spent in getting angry is then diverted to look for solutions.

Now, Be Supportive

Accepting the problem is a huge step on the person’s part. Plus, accepting your help does take a lot of mental mending too. At this point, the person needs your support to get over this problem. So, appreciate small changes and reward them with little trinkets and compliments. Harshly punishing the person will only backfire and make the person lose belief in himself.

While learning how to deal with an angry person, it is important to understand that the person may not be aware of his problem. So, such people need extra care and attention. Avoiding triggers is no way of dealing with the problem, as they are always of a recurring nature. Confrontation is the only method to solve impending issues that aggravate the mind and brain and make one angry. Stifling or ignoring only worsens the situation.

Keep aware of what the anger from the other person is telling you. Deal with those situations using these tips and see if there is a different outcome.

Thanks again

Sean

Sean McPheat
Managing Director
MTD Management Course

Click below for a:
FREE email course “Improve Your Management Skills”

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We’ve talked about anger and the importance of properly managing it in the past. The truth is that everyone is going to get angry while at work at least once during the course of his career. Everyone will handle that anger differently but there are a few who will have no idea how to appropriately respond to anger – especially in a formal environment. While throwing things around or yelling may work in the privacy of your home, it simply doesn’t fly in the work environment.

For this reason it is important to run an anger management class for your entire workplace. Everyone should participate, whether they have shown signs of anger problems at work or not. Someone might be having problems at home that the course might help while others may have something brewing just under the surface.

Simply put, here are a few reasons you can use to justify running an anger management class at work:

• Human resources might want management to take an anger management course as a preventative measure; so that they can control themselves and understand what their employees are going through.
• Your employees may recognize that they have anger problems but may not have any idea where to turn for help – and, as such, won’t get help unless it is offered.
• You can make participation in an anger management class a condition of employment for employees who have displayed anger problems in the past.
• Taking an anger management class might help someone in your group at home – and people who are happy at home will be happier and less distracted at work.
• Anger management classes might help your employees work better together, especially in groups where there is constantly friction due to personality conflict.

Anger management classes aren’t the end-all-be-all when it comes to solving problems – but they can help. Consider adding one to the schedule in your workplace soon. You might be surprised at how effective the classes really are.

Thanks again,
Sean

Sean McPheat
Managing Director
MTD Leadership Development

Click below for a:
Free email course “Improve your Management Skills”

Something we don’t necessarily talk about enough is your level of interpersonal skills. Your interpersonal skills dictate your ability to communicate and deal with other individuals on a regular basis. If you lack interpersonal skills you may find yourself labeled as difficult to communicate with, stubborn, aloof, or any of a number of negative descriptions.

In order to develop great interpersonal skills you need to focus on four main qualities. These can be summarised easily by remembering the STAR acronym.

• S = Sensitivity. You need to be aware of the different needs of each of the people on your team. No two people are alike, and each will need to be treated differently.
• T = Tolerance. Not everyone you work with will have the same beliefs. You need, especially as a manager, to be able to set aside your own personal beliefs so that you can objectively work with and understand the beliefs of your employees. Tolerance applies not only to cultural and religious beliefs but to individual work ethic as well (within reason, of course).
• A = Assertion. You’re the manager. You’re in charge. You have the final say. You don’t have to be arrogant or rude to get your point across but if you see something about to go wrong you do need to have the guts to stand up for yourself and your ideas.
• R = Restraint. We all have times where we want to say or do something inappropriate. You need to have the presence of mind to stop and think before speaking or taking action. If you need help, go back and brush up on some of your anger management tactics.

Get all four of these factors under control and you’re bound to build beautiful relationships with your team members and fellow managers. Let one slip and you may just find you aren’t necessarily a favourite within your office.

Thanks again,
Sean

Sean McPheat
Managing Director
MTD Management Training Courses

Click below for a:
Free email course “Improve your Management Skills”<-->

Mismanagement. That’s a strange way of thinking about anger, in’t it? Every single one of us will, at some point, become angry with another person or situation. When we begin to feel that anger rise up we have to decide how to control (or mange) it – but we have a choice. We can use our anger positively or mismanage it, thus causing us to act out in rage.

Those who mismanage their anger (approximately 1 in 5 people) may soon find themselves headed down a difficult path. They may find themselves in abusive situations, may find themselves experiencing road rage, or maybe even participate in an act of workplace violence.

I could speak to you about anger management techniques until my face turns blue, but here’s an interesting fact. The other day I read an article that talked about a poll taken in the US where in 2 out of every 10 people admitted to having become angry enough at work to want to hurt another employee. The truth? Things like this happen all around the world – no exceptions.

As a manager you need to be alert and aware at all times. Watch for signs of anger mismanagement not only in yourself but in your employees and team members. If the signs you see aren’t triggered by a single event, or seem to continue for a lengthy period of time, you may need to consider whether or not it is safe to keep the employee in question on your team.

Perhaps he or she needs more help than you’re able to give from a mentor/mentee standpoint. In the end, the safety of you and the rest of your team is paramount. Think about it.

Thanks again,
Sean

Sean McPheat
Managing Director
MTD Manager Training

Click below for a:
Free email course “Improve your Management Skills”

Anger is a natural human reaction to a difficult situation. Humans use anger to convey a change in attitude and to signal others to modify their behavior or suffer the consequences, whether that consequence be in the form violence, loss of job, or some other punishment.

Unfortunately, many people aren’t able to control their anger and let it get out of control. They don’t properly convey their feelings and usually end up hurting themselves as well as others. Here are a few more anger management techniques you can use when you start to feel out of control.

Sit down and have a conversation with yourself. Find a place where you can sit down and tell yourself “I am angry right now because…” and fill in the blank. You can do this alone in order to get control of your feelings or you can use it as an opportunity to start a conversation with the person you feel caused your anger. Just remember – no yelling!

Meditation is a highly recommended stress reliever. Meditation gives people the opportunity to clear their minds and refocus on the task at hand. You’ll be able to revisit any situation without the negative feelings you had initially. You can take a class on meditation or even find a video or recording to guide yourself at home.

Find a reason to laugh. Laughter is, after all, the best medicine. Keep a funny book, picture, recording, or video saved in a place where you can access it at all times. When you feel angry, whip out your favorite funny piece and have a good laugh. It’ll give you a chance to rebalance yourself while diffusing some of your anger.

Remember, while anger is natural, it can be controlled. As a manager, courses in dealing with conflict or being assertive may also teach you new ways to control your anger in a difficult situation. In the end, though, be sure that you never let your anger get the best of you, either at home or at work!

Thanks again,
Sean

Sean McPheat
Managing Director
MTD Management Training

Click below for a:
Free email course “Improve your Management Skills”